Coming from ‘jazz’ ..i dropped her home .. somehow I had decided that i would always drop her home first ..specially after the ‘make over ‘ it was more apt to make this decision …. C on I was getting more time to spend with her ( actually more time to gaze may be)… “ so when next?” I asked pleadingly … “hmm… pata nahi yaar ..may be on Friday before you go to pune”…. “ hmm…. pukka nothing before this” I sounded terrible..i really had started believing that she wasn’t interested in me any more … I spent the rest of the week trying to console myself …may be she was actually tied up in the preparations ..but aisi bhi kya preparations hoti hai yaar …these may be were may be possible genuine reasons one cannot question… anyways come Friday and my last evening in Mumbai for this leave …. “ so where to day” I asked uninterested ( thought she ll avoid meeting today also) … “ lets meet at juhu chowpatty” … now though I have stayed half my life in Mumbai i still don’t have any distinct memories of this supposingly landmark of Mumbai … it’s the place lovers used to romance in the early 90’s movies and the villian apparently ends up at this place chasing himself away from the police or the hero whatever!!! It wasn’t a hassel reaching this tourist attraction ( it actually features as a tourist spot in most of the travel magazines) …. As usual I had had gone to meet the same old course mate of mine and had to return home preferably before 1100 pm … It was around sunset time when I reached the beach ( if I can call it) and it seemed to be a funfair ground or something .. it was swarming with people …. People were sitting with their shoes off on the sand and seemed to be at peace as if it was the loneliest corner of the earth and so silent that they closed their eyes attaining nirvana… or maybe they were closing their eyes to prevent the dust thrown around by those around three thousand people there …and were sitting because they were actually now tired looking for a lonely part on the beach and finally given up !!!! it had typically everything present there one can imagine of an Indian outback ..it had cows ... horses …camels … number of rides used to entertain kids and huge horde of junk food vendors .. they seem to have occupied every possible place of that beach where one can sit with his girlfriend …there were also some mobile junk food vendors who hung their paraphernalia in their strong necks and walked the short beach looking for only couples I guess !! as they stopped in front of a lonely couple in variably ruining their love life!!! … the beach seemed to have sand in patches it was all covered with all sorts of paper … newspapers … paper plates … paper spoons ..( they are used to eat the famous ‘bhel’ ) … there were topless boys playing in the sea actually making it a unpleasant site….what was I expecting anyways … one of the interesting thing about this beach is that it is just on the takeoff path of the domestic airport of Mumbai and all aircraft pass really low over this part when they turn over the sea … giving a rather unusual view of the aircraft from underneath … anyways I scanned the entire beach to find a place where we could sit and I realized unless you want to eat something there was no place where you could find a decent place to sit… I went straight towards the sea cutting through the layer of people before it … and just short of the water placed myself on the sand waiting for her…
“where are you” she called and asked me … “wait don’t bother finding me ,,you ll not be able to .. wait on the road before those bhel stalls im coming out of this mela”… she was as usual looking all dressed up to be gazed at … wearing a pink some kind of layered top with white pants was not at all dressed to take a plunge in that funfair ( I wonder where so many people came from on a Friday evening ) .. “ is it so crowed because its Friday or generally so much crowded?” I asked … “aare its generally crowded .. but its only till sunset ..after its dark it generally gets empty” she replied looking at the beach … empty? I believe she was talking about the water in the sea maybe … cause the beach was far from getting empty for the next week or something… “I suggest we go to ‘mocha’ café there” I said pointing at the coffee cum restobar bang opposite the chowpatty.. she agreed and we headed towards mocha .. and guess what the crowd I was talking about … mocha seemed to be their coffee shop i guess....as the same amount of people seemed to be inside that not so big café .. “do people in Mumbai have nothing to do?”I said irritated with the people around me … “ well you are one of them .. actually you are the one from outside.. get used it” she replied smiling.. .. we placed ourselves in the middle of something like a long connected sofa or something which had many tables in front of them which made the people sitting next you different from you .. seeing from a distance it appeared like a long table ..as if all the people sitting were together … the tables were placed so close to each other ..that anything you order else than a coffee or a drink you had share the table with your neighbor … people seemed to be attached to each other and closeness prevailed in the true sense of the word!!!… sitting in that place one could do nothing but have coffee and gaze at each other ..in case you need to speak you had to shout leaning towards the ear of the other person .. as not withstanding the crowd there was also some kind of music which was not at all discernible … anyways sitting in that local train kind of atmosphere … she ordered a wine and me a coffee (as beer was over!!! ) and was in no mood to drink in that place which was lacking of oxygen in the first place!!! It was also a target rich environment with all kind of girls all over the place wearing from barely nothing to barely something … and since I preferred keeping quiet instead shouting in her ear I kept my eyes viewing those clothes deprived chicks scattered all over the place … we barely had any conversation there … she took her own sweet time finishing her wine ..( she somehow seemed to enjoy and felt comfortable there) … I gulped the whole coffee in one go I guess … ( somehow the hot coffee served at these outlets is just about warm ) … she realized and nothing could have been more obvious what I wanted to do after that .. I wanted to get the hell out of that local train … lack of oxygen place!!!! Well it was barely 0800 pm when we stepped out … the beach was visible across the road and yes she was right .. it had actually emptied up now a lot …. “see I told you .. people will not be there once its dark” she said looking at the beach across the road and having that sheepish smile… “haan … kyun is it not safe there at night”I asked in a serious tone ( I really don’t know what I had mind when I said ‘safe’) …. “ahaa safe ?? u mean you are scared that you ll get raped there haan” she joked and started laughing … she started heading towards the beach “lets see how safe is it” she almost shouted crossing the road … I was still on the other side gazing at the beach ..( was I really scared that ill be raped ) … we walked over the sand towards the sea and sat down short of the water .. sometime time back this place was buzzing with all kinds of activities… and same place seemed pretty peaceful now .. I was out the ‘mocha’ mood now and was gazing at the dark sea.. “ so when next?”I asked picking up the sand in one hand… “well you tell me ..when are going to that jungle of yours waise” she asked amused.. “ a aim leaving on end this Saturday ya … and really don’t know when next ill get leave .. waise bhi I have availed most of it … maybe in the year end ... you still think we don’t have any future haan” (now why was that asked… hopeless ..real loser!!!!) “ don’t start it again yaar” she said looking at me with that tired expression that she didn’t want to discuss it any more…. “ yaar its not that what you thinking … I mean I hope we ll still be touch and you know have same chemistry … cause I really don’t wanna lose out on you yaar… cause I don’t really know where am I heading ..what my routine is gonna be like … don’t know will I give you the same amount of time … I really don’t know anything yaar now….cause In case we cannot do justice to our relationship we should stop meeting yaar cause I really am getting attached to you but I know there s nothing we can do about it ..” ( what the heck was I speaking) I was getting all senti again..( really why do I get all philosophical yaar) … “aare what happened to you why suddenly .. you so senti or is it the beach… don’t worry dude.. why do keep thinking so much about us .. in case we are supposed to be together we will be .. in case we don’t we will not .. don’t waste time thinking about … chalo in case we break up when you are there in your jungle .. I have something for you that will make you remember me” she said looking up for something in her handbag… she took out something like a small box that was all wrapped up … “ here take this this will remind you of me” ... she said handing it over …. I opened it slowly looking at her … our first of the gifts… and she was one giving it to me .. another loser act of mine!!!! Anyways it was a watch ….the types which I had only seen in magazines maybe… its look was expensive .. it was leather bound .big dial head watch which was as broad as a tennis wrist band … “wow..its awesome ..but I cannot have this yaar” ..i said returning it her … “now stop your nautanki …I bloody well know you want it …keep it …ok..please keep it sir ..as a token of my love …so that before breaking up you see this and change your mind ..”she joked smiling … .. I removed my old watch ..(which also was a gift ) and wore my latest possession .. well I had to remove it before I reach home anyways .. “there you go ..not bad haan” she said looking at the watch on my hand… “ absolutely no” I replied gazing at the most expensive thing on my hand ever .. it was already 1030 … “listen yaar I have to go re” she said( c on dude ..its the last time you seeing her this year maybe) … “what ?? so early ..” ( well it was more applicable for me to head home ) I really didn’t wanna go … I kept looking at her as she sat in the taxi and headed into infinity .. I had no idea when would I meet her next .. what was I heading for … what turn my life was gonna take after this .. I was about to step into the working regime of the airforce .. my training days were over .. the real thing was starting up …I know I was going to the place and do things I was waiting for ..but there was something I was leaving behind and taking only memories I had live with for the rest of the year ….
MOHANBARI LEGENDS!!!!!!
Friday, October 16, 2009
Monday, October 12, 2009
not just 'JAZZ' by the bay!!!!
Not just jazz by the bay!!!!!
“hey just landed where are we meeting” I asked her around 1900 h.. “hey will be able to meet ya little late ya … waise we ll go to ‘jazz’ ..its a nice place” … well as usual I had no clue where ‘jazz’ was.... “waise where is it?” the old panicky or may be loser question was back… “I mean what should I tell the taxi driver” I continued…. “ aare tell him to take you to marine drive … there is big hotel ‘continental’ its near that .. you get down there only”….well pretty specific…thank god… as usual I landed up early on time .. and for a change found the place in the first shot …well I had nothing else to do anyways …the place was not ‘jazz’ but ‘not just jazz by the bay’ I guess the ‘jazz’ written in the centre boldly misguides people.. it was located off the marine drive about 50 m from the sea face … I preferred waiting for her on the sea face than moving in that smoke filled restobar… this time somehow I wasn’t thinking much about the evening … all relaxed .. didn’t bother what I was gonna say … how is the evening gonna be .. no plans .. for the first time …well I guess that s the way it should have been from the beginning … I brought a malboro lights packet ( coz we smoke when we drink remember!!!) …. I paid the cover charge of entering and booked ourselves a table .. .. strolling outside the place I crossed the road and went at the sea face .. its always a delight to see Mumbai from the marine drive at night .. the ‘queens necklace’ they say is one of the most beautiful sights in india… I lit a cigarette ( I really don’t know why ) maybe got carried away by the exotic(maybe polluted!!) atmosphere around me … it was already an hour I had reached the place .. I sat on the stone stand off the footpath facing the sea… I don’t know how but I wasn’t tensed at all for this meeting … I was thinking about the decisions I had taken on our last meeting .. what a fool I was ..running away and getting all perturbed when things were actually in my favour … “ hey where are you ..i m already outside jazz” I got a sms …. I turned behind and could see her across the road … she was looking the other way when I called her “ hey im just across the road … look towards the sea .. ya see me … just come across its brilliant here” … “aare come this side na .. we ll not get a table” … “yaar I have already booked a table .. come here for sometime na” … I wanted to sit with her on that stone bench … I somehow was finding that place too peaceful amidst the roaring traffic on marine drive … a sense of calmness was setting in me … was is the cigarette ..i guess not !!! I don’t know but I was liking it there…. “hey there you are .. what are you doing here ?” ....i was seeing her after about 2 months and gosh !!! what had happened to her … she seemed far more prettier than ever … she had changed her hair and now they were as straight as though they were ironed or something ( i guess that’s what girls call it ).. those wavy hair were all gone … I guess her new hair cut with that blonde colour on it was making her appear something else… she was wearing a black top which I would describe nothing but ‘sexy’ … she seemed to have had a ‘make over’ or something … all the calmness that had set into me was all gone now and I was gazing her the same way I did when I had first met her .. ( remember those horny looks) … “hey you not feeling well or something” I asked “ no why” .. “nah you looking so beautiful na ..thats why” I joked ( I know it sucked ) but she smiled…. We sat there gazing at the sea .. she told me she got late as her sister wedding preparations were going on and she had actually run away from home to meet me tonight … I was least bothered what the reason was ..i was still gazing at her thinking why had I run away from this chick who today was simply looking fabulous …. Anyways I completed my cigarette which i wasn’t even smoking now and set inside ‘jazz’…
‘jazz’ was one of the smallest lounge bar s I have been .. it was all dark inside and fully crowded … surprisingly our seat was still reserved and I had to face all the envious eyes of those standing around the bar counter while I was merrily walking in with this gorgeous chick and taking a seat straight away … maybe they thought I was a gangster or something ( the looks I mean) … anyways it was a karaoke night or something that evening and the usual jazz band wasn’t playing .. thank god !! who listens to that stuff anyways … the band that was playing was having I guess a group of people of an average age of 50.. “ yahaan par buddho ka band hai kya” … I asked bedazzled looking at those seemingly retired ‘band’ of people …. “nahi re … wait and listen to them na ..they play well”… we ordered our drinks ..i guess she didn’t wanna go home today also ..she was having vodka …. Since I was in calm mood I ordered like a true fauji officer …whisky on the rocks ( you should seen her expression when I ordered it ) the band actually playing well and I guess the lead vocalist (read grandpa ) had started singing bryan adams.. well the conversation started with our previous meetings … my foolish nautanki of running away …. Her changed looks .. her colouring her hair … well I still hadn’t stopped gazing … it was 2 drinks down when grandpa started singing ‘please forgive me’ … I guess he read my mind ..i was waiting for a song where I could apologize for my nautanki… I started singing along with grandpa and actually didn’t realize that was loud enough to make grandpa look at me … well she too started singing and now the bouncers were looking at us .. I guess again me only … and waiting that i do something funny and they throw me out … maybe they were jealous of me ... of the company I was having and was getting the chance to sing to her also!!! …. The later evening saw some amateurs singing some numbers which actually I didn’t bother to pay attention to …she told that she wont be meeting me for a week now she was busy in her sisters wedding preparations … “yaar im just there for a week in Mumbai .. then im goin to pune ..then from there off to dibrugarh” I said slightly shocked that she wont be meeting for the time im actually there in her city … is she really not interested in me now ?? does she think im actually ugly after she s done her makeover …. What is It … I was in these thoughts when she said “ why dont you join us at the wedding its on next Sunday” .... I thought I barely have managed to patch up with her only and .. now why does she want me to meet her entire family when there isn’t actually any future for us … “ pagal hai kya .. no no I wont come for wedding and all” …. “But yaar you have to meet me before I leave for pune re ..” I pleaded … “ fine baba we ll see” … I walked out of ‘jazz’ again sad … why was I getting senti everytime I meet her .. does she really like me …why am I getting so attracted to her…. Why is she not attracted to me as I am … all the whisky on the rocks seemed to have gone to the rock bottom of my body and I was again confused …sentimental … about to puke … don’t know what but far away from being calm….
Juhu chowpatty blues!!!!
“hey just landed where are we meeting” I asked her around 1900 h.. “hey will be able to meet ya little late ya … waise we ll go to ‘jazz’ ..its a nice place” … well as usual I had no clue where ‘jazz’ was.... “waise where is it?” the old panicky or may be loser question was back… “I mean what should I tell the taxi driver” I continued…. “ aare tell him to take you to marine drive … there is big hotel ‘continental’ its near that .. you get down there only”….well pretty specific…thank god… as usual I landed up early on time .. and for a change found the place in the first shot …well I had nothing else to do anyways …the place was not ‘jazz’ but ‘not just jazz by the bay’ I guess the ‘jazz’ written in the centre boldly misguides people.. it was located off the marine drive about 50 m from the sea face … I preferred waiting for her on the sea face than moving in that smoke filled restobar… this time somehow I wasn’t thinking much about the evening … all relaxed .. didn’t bother what I was gonna say … how is the evening gonna be .. no plans .. for the first time …well I guess that s the way it should have been from the beginning … I brought a malboro lights packet ( coz we smoke when we drink remember!!!) …. I paid the cover charge of entering and booked ourselves a table .. .. strolling outside the place I crossed the road and went at the sea face .. its always a delight to see Mumbai from the marine drive at night .. the ‘queens necklace’ they say is one of the most beautiful sights in india… I lit a cigarette ( I really don’t know why ) maybe got carried away by the exotic(maybe polluted!!) atmosphere around me … it was already an hour I had reached the place .. I sat on the stone stand off the footpath facing the sea… I don’t know how but I wasn’t tensed at all for this meeting … I was thinking about the decisions I had taken on our last meeting .. what a fool I was ..running away and getting all perturbed when things were actually in my favour … “ hey where are you ..i m already outside jazz” I got a sms …. I turned behind and could see her across the road … she was looking the other way when I called her “ hey im just across the road … look towards the sea .. ya see me … just come across its brilliant here” … “aare come this side na .. we ll not get a table” … “yaar I have already booked a table .. come here for sometime na” … I wanted to sit with her on that stone bench … I somehow was finding that place too peaceful amidst the roaring traffic on marine drive … a sense of calmness was setting in me … was is the cigarette ..i guess not !!! I don’t know but I was liking it there…. “hey there you are .. what are you doing here ?” ....i was seeing her after about 2 months and gosh !!! what had happened to her … she seemed far more prettier than ever … she had changed her hair and now they were as straight as though they were ironed or something ( i guess that’s what girls call it ).. those wavy hair were all gone … I guess her new hair cut with that blonde colour on it was making her appear something else… she was wearing a black top which I would describe nothing but ‘sexy’ … she seemed to have had a ‘make over’ or something … all the calmness that had set into me was all gone now and I was gazing her the same way I did when I had first met her .. ( remember those horny looks) … “hey you not feeling well or something” I asked “ no why” .. “nah you looking so beautiful na ..thats why” I joked ( I know it sucked ) but she smiled…. We sat there gazing at the sea .. she told me she got late as her sister wedding preparations were going on and she had actually run away from home to meet me tonight … I was least bothered what the reason was ..i was still gazing at her thinking why had I run away from this chick who today was simply looking fabulous …. Anyways I completed my cigarette which i wasn’t even smoking now and set inside ‘jazz’…
‘jazz’ was one of the smallest lounge bar s I have been .. it was all dark inside and fully crowded … surprisingly our seat was still reserved and I had to face all the envious eyes of those standing around the bar counter while I was merrily walking in with this gorgeous chick and taking a seat straight away … maybe they thought I was a gangster or something ( the looks I mean) … anyways it was a karaoke night or something that evening and the usual jazz band wasn’t playing .. thank god !! who listens to that stuff anyways … the band that was playing was having I guess a group of people of an average age of 50.. “ yahaan par buddho ka band hai kya” … I asked bedazzled looking at those seemingly retired ‘band’ of people …. “nahi re … wait and listen to them na ..they play well”… we ordered our drinks ..i guess she didn’t wanna go home today also ..she was having vodka …. Since I was in calm mood I ordered like a true fauji officer …whisky on the rocks ( you should seen her expression when I ordered it ) the band actually playing well and I guess the lead vocalist (read grandpa ) had started singing bryan adams.. well the conversation started with our previous meetings … my foolish nautanki of running away …. Her changed looks .. her colouring her hair … well I still hadn’t stopped gazing … it was 2 drinks down when grandpa started singing ‘please forgive me’ … I guess he read my mind ..i was waiting for a song where I could apologize for my nautanki… I started singing along with grandpa and actually didn’t realize that was loud enough to make grandpa look at me … well she too started singing and now the bouncers were looking at us .. I guess again me only … and waiting that i do something funny and they throw me out … maybe they were jealous of me ... of the company I was having and was getting the chance to sing to her also!!! …. The later evening saw some amateurs singing some numbers which actually I didn’t bother to pay attention to …she told that she wont be meeting me for a week now she was busy in her sisters wedding preparations … “yaar im just there for a week in Mumbai .. then im goin to pune ..then from there off to dibrugarh” I said slightly shocked that she wont be meeting for the time im actually there in her city … is she really not interested in me now ?? does she think im actually ugly after she s done her makeover …. What is It … I was in these thoughts when she said “ why dont you join us at the wedding its on next Sunday” .... I thought I barely have managed to patch up with her only and .. now why does she want me to meet her entire family when there isn’t actually any future for us … “ pagal hai kya .. no no I wont come for wedding and all” …. “But yaar you have to meet me before I leave for pune re ..” I pleaded … “ fine baba we ll see” … I walked out of ‘jazz’ again sad … why was I getting senti everytime I meet her .. does she really like me …why am I getting so attracted to her…. Why is she not attracted to me as I am … all the whisky on the rocks seemed to have gone to the rock bottom of my body and I was again confused …sentimental … about to puke … don’t know what but far away from being calm….
Juhu chowpatty blues!!!!
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
mondegar cafe!!!
Mondegar café !!!
Getting out of the taxi millions of thoughts started cluttering my mind .. does she really drink ?? will she like be drunk ?? will I have to carry her like those dates in Hollywood movies ( recently being incorporated in hindi movies too!!) and will we land up in bed tonight … will I be able to handle it ..how much money do I have ?? what the hell I don’t even know the way back home …!!!!
“ do you have 20 bucks change” …..” hmm ya .. ( stupid don’t give her the change pay the taxi fare you ass) hey wait ill pay ( my chivalrous fauji woke up) ….. “nah nah I have already paid don’t bother anyways I got the change” … “ no no ill pay” …. “aare nahi see you are in Bombay now na .. ill treat you in this city” ( wow!! The typical Gemini miser I was maybe waiting for hearing this …but this statement of her s made years back she still keeps her word … she just doesn’t allow me to pay .. either she knows how fauji s are paid or she s a hard core feminist .. anyways I absolutely have no problems with it …) .. mondegar café is on one of the main street s of colaba , one of the see facing front of Mumbai, and is lighted up like a old goa street selling old antiques and imported stuff from the dockyards …its generally flooded with the foreign tourists and street vendors… walking inside mondegar I felt I entered one of the cow boy bar s in texas … the place was full of white skinned people god knows where they came from!!! And the set up seemed to have been picked up from some old cow boy movies with a cane wood furniture .. closely placed tables … a juke box in one end … well i had never entered a place like this in Mumbai … (what the hell where ill get that lonely corner to chat and drink with her) ..before this thought had crossed my mind I found her placing herself on her chair next to the juke box .. the table was almost on one edge of it … (hey I wanted pull he chair for you ya ).. she was really one girl with ‘im in control’ attitude … “ so wat will you have” she pops up… “ well let me see” … “ I guess beer” she says …. ( now she really reads my mind man ) .. “ well ya how about you” … “hmm ill take wine today” ( today ?? what does that mean …. ) .. “so you generally take wine haan” … “nah nah …I like vodka ..lekin aaj ghar bhi jaana hai” ( ok so the going to bed wit her tonight is not happening tonight .. I guess neither the lifting her up thing...) and so my first date starts with a toast of beer and wine … the conversation seemed decent for about first half hour and the till first rotation of drinks took place .. “ so do you smoke”( i actually asked out of curiosity ..as I knew she didn’t)… “ hmm ya only when I drink” ( what!!!!!!! She is awesome man .. where was she all this while man .. I thought its only in movies where people go out on their first date to a beer bar .. drink and smoke together ) well but the catch was I never smoked maybe one odd occasion … “ hmm well I don’t have a cigarette” .. “ well that’s ok they keep it ask the waiter he ll get it” …. So here we are two drinks down …smoking Marlboro lights .. chatting the hell about each and everything we been through .. about girlfriends .. boyfriends .. why into flying … you look good in that pic on orkut and stuff …I know it is pretty normal for many people but it was becoming like a dream date come true!!! Three drinks down and we were all laughing our jaws out .. was I being really funny?? Anyways somehow with every drink the volume of our talk seemed to increase …the waiters or bouncers or whatever they were supposed to be seemed to only observe us ..maybe only me and waiting for the earliest opportunity to throw me out ..i guess they were nt that happy with the pair … anyways I was on cloud 9 .. I was already feeling like hugh grant from ‘notting hill’ dating Julia Roberts or something … I even played ‘leaving on the jet plane’ the john denver version in the juke box which was about a hands distance from where I was sitting ..
It was maybe 4 or 5 drinks down when we walked out of mondegar café ..( man I m not gonna forget this place) .. I was already feeling like a cow boy walking out of this bar … with the girl I may be dreamt of being with … trying to smoke stylishly … and trying not to stumble down while walking .. man I was drunk !!!! “ so where are heading now” I asked … “maybe home” she says … “nah lets take a walk or something na … hey whats that ..is that the taj hotel??” …. “ ya its just walking distance from here” …. “ oh wow that means the gateway of india is nearby haan” ( that sounded so kiddish ) hey lets walk till gateway of india na” … “ for what ? what are we gonna do there” …. “ aare chal na” …. So we start walking towards the greatest tourist spot of mumbai which I guess I had seen a million times but with her it seemed so hopelessly romantic .. maybe I just wanted to spent more time with her now… now gateway of india is one spot which actually represents Mumbai in the statement ‘the city that never sleeps’ as it was 1030 pm and the place was crowded the same way it was on colaba street at 0830 … maybe the entire crowd of mondegar came here for a walk .. or maybe it was a one way and people had to come this way to go further ahead .. anyways approaching the gateway I realized a man rushing towards with something black in his hand .. is it a gun?? “ bhai saab photo khichani hai kya?” …. Photo?? Ohh it’s a Polaroid camera .. the one which gives you instantaneous photos … “ nahi nahi” she replied even before I was trying to register what did he really want from me … “well… haan lenge… lets take a pic na plzzz”( what the hell … im sure it was one of her most embarrassing moments) …. “ what are you crazy … im not taking a picture” … “aare plzz just one yaar .. for our first meeting( im being a loser again)” … “nahi yaar this is so cheap”… “ aare nothing ya ..haan bhaiya le lo” …..before she could react I was already holding her tight with my left hand and posing in front of the gateway of india… “ aare yeh achi nahi hai … ek aur lo” I thought I was wasn’t looking good at all( what difference it makes .its not the photographer s fault anyways!!!) “ you are really mad .. I m not taking any more pics” .. “ aare plz last one .. stand otherwise ill pick you up”( pick you up????? What was that .. I never heard that even in a movie) …. “ I cant believe im doing this” … there came the second picture .. “wow you look really good ya”( I was actually looking at myself) .. “ chalo ho gaya let s go now” … “ aare wait na …. Hey whats that ?? are those boats sailing now?” … “ that is not a boat it’s a ferry ride” …. “ wow lets go na it wont take long plzzzzz” …. “ uff this is too much shounak ..that meant for kids yaar” …… “ no yaar it ll be fun ..i have never been in one plz see its about to leave it’s the last one ya … plz I don’t know whether ill meet you again or no” that was not at all sentimental and sounded so stupid that we both started laughing. .. “ well chalo” I said and both jumped into the ferry for 10 bucks a ticket … sitting on the first floor of that junk ferry boat are two drunk people sitting in the middle of middle aged women with their kids .. ( man where have so many kids come that this time )and only odd people were both of us .. trying to control our laughter in middle of that floating kindergarten… I guess all the aunties were staring at me … maybe even they wanted to throw me out at the earliest opportunity … do they know im drunk or something ? are we smelling ?... “ lets go downstairs na .. bahut boring hai upar” I said looking at a real healthy aunty staring babdly at me .. “ ok” chalo…. Wow!!! To my surprise there was actually no own except that ferry staff on the ground floor of that boat … “lets stand there in the corner” and we moved right at the back of the boat …which the loneliest part of that boat … now the ride seemed really exotic .. it was a dark night ( its generally is in Mumbai) only sound of the waves and yes the kids on the first floor … i could hear and see a chetak helicopter at a distance maybe a navy aircraft doing night flying… “ well you know this has been the best date ever” I broke the silence … “ my previous girlfriend was a real jerk” ….she smiles comes close to me “ im standing here and you still are remembering your ex girlfriend” … I cannot explain in words the expression in her eyes .. if I had a weak heart .. I probably would have had an heart attack ….i cannot forget those eyes … we moved more closer and before I realized our lips had locked .. they were as delicate as petals … everything seemed to have become standstill.. I could no longer hear the children …neither the chopper flying nor the waves … I guess this is what is like being in heaven … oooo…. Whats this I had a strange feeling in my pants .. ok its not what you guys thinking about .. I mean yes that too.. but it was my cell vibrating and ringing … great la bollywood style ..the phone rings at the wrong time .. “ hello dad …ya im still with my coursemate ( that s what I had told the reason to leave home) .. hmm im at colaba .. will take atleast 45 mins more to reach back” … ( look idiot what have you ruined …) ….. “ hey im sorry ..” I thought I had again goofed it all up .. but I was wrong .. that look I mentioned before was still there in her eyes maybe more naughtier now .. I couldn’t keep my hands off her … “ I knew it was you” I whispered in her ear ..( I have no clue what it meant may I wanted to tell her that was it you I had got into the airforce for …I always dreamt about .. always wanted a girlfriend like you .. I really don’t know) but it all seemed perfect now …
The ferry brought us back to the gateway of india… I had walked into the boat having a decent distance from her .. I was getting down all hand in hand …. Things had definitely changed between us in that half an hour …we caught a taxi back home … I even bought a rose ..those really long stem ones they sell at traffic signals ..i know I was embarrassing her but now I didn’t care .. I guess even she didn’t care now ..cause she broke the stem and folded the flower like a bedsheet and kept it in her purse ( I guess she still has it) … anyways I was the one who got down first as my home happened to be on the way first ( what a loser again … should have dropped her first) anyways ..a good bye kiss and a promise to meet tomorrow kept me awake entire night as I recollected every moment I had spend my first date with her ….
The second disaster!!!!!we broke up
The second disaster!!!!!we broke up
“hey when are we meeting today” the first thing I did after I woke up was this sms… “ well don’t know yaar slightly busy in the office today “ …. “ what .. plz do meet na otherwise ill come at your office” ( I had no clue where her office was ) …. “ thik hai baba .. will meet around 0730 ..anyways you don’t know where my office is “ ( I told you she s much smarter than me)… entire day I kept thinking about how am I gonna go about this evening ..no fuck ups this time .. will pay all the bills and yes also drop her home first ….. all set for the evening ..even brought a new deodorant for that … we decided to meet somewhere near to the chowpatty … she told me she knew a good sea facing restaurant there ..but couldn’t remember its name .. but knew the approximate location.. now if she doesn’t know where the place is it’s a real emergency for me to tell the taxi driver where to stop ..so my evening begins with (yet again ) a loser question “ hey tell me where should I tell the taxi driver to take me yaar” … “aare just tell him to take you to chowpatty” … “ aare im already on chowpatty its so big yaar” …. “ what you already reached ?? y so early its still 0700 re” … “ aare you don’t know my parents yaar I have to come out of the house early …coming late ill manage a reason” … I actually had no course mate of mine in Mumbai that time but just an imaginary naval coursemate whose name I was using to step out of the house …. Well she guided me to somewhere near that place where we were supposed to meet .. ‘salt water grill’ the name really appeared exciting to me .. it was a open air restaurant on the beach adjoining the chowpatty .. a real exotic location though it was just off the main road .. so not much silence ..but the location seemed mind blowing .. it was a fully open air place with a wooden stage kind of thing where they had placed wooden tables …. Chiffon transparent curtains separated each table from the other and was beautifully lit by candles in those long glass holders .. in the middle was a sandy open portion where they had placed two or three big hammocks … I guess two people of my size could easily sleep in them .. whether they will be able to hold my weight or no Im not sure .. ahead of that was the sea face which had those sun bath chairs with cushions .. which actually had been made as a sitting arrangement with a small table in between .. you would be facing the sea if you d be lying on them … I decided that we would be sitting there once she arrives … “where are you im already thr” I asked her “aare me in taxi will be thr in 15 mins” came the reply …. There was a water sports outlet or club something next to the restaurant .. kids where all over the place there … and seemed to be quite crowded even though it was turning dark .. I walked further ahead towards the beach .. there was a long bridge jetting into the sea .. it was used as a mounting platform by the water sports club for getting onto those speed boats and water bikes .. looking around I got an beautiful view of the brightly lit Mumbai at dusk … it suddenly started smelling good looking at that view …when i realized that she was standing right behind me .. “ ohh .. hey hi … when did you come .. waise nice perfume” ( what nice perfume!! … what a dog !! she must have thought in her mind I guess) … “ just came ..saw you gazing at the skyline” … “ ohh ya its pretty beautiful .. but not as u look today” ( god I really have to read some good one liner book man and stop seeing shahrukh khan movies) … well she was looking stunning anyways .. wearing that light yellow office shirt and cream trousers she again appeared perfect … I pity the guys working with her .. im sure she would be a real distraction at her work place … anyways appearing to be fully in control this time I directed her towards the restaurant ( forgot that she was the one who had selected the place afterall)… we placed ourselves each on those sun bath chairs with that stupid table in between … well I must say these chairs are really comfortable ..i guess I should one of them in front of my tv … “ so what will you have” I asked … “ hmm let me see” she said picking up the menu .. it had some fancy names for the cocktails they served … “hmm I ll have this one” … I don’t remember what the name was , but reading the contents written below it made it clear it was some vodka based cocktail .. “ hmm so vodka today haan” I asked teasingly… “ don’t wanna go home today kya” …she smiled and replied “ sure we are going to your house after this” ( she knew I didn’t have the balls to take her to my place anyways) … I also ordered something which I couldn’t pronounce but expected to be good ….
I don’t know if it happens with any one else but when I drink everything seems beautiful to me .. and I start noticing minute details of people … I noticed she had a black lining under her eyes and her eyes were carefully worn with a mild makeup which was enhancing her eyes beautifully … “ hey you have amazing eyes” I said finishing my drink , i got up from my chair and shifted onto her s ( ok I was trying to do that for a long time ) … and now both of us were placed on the same chair … for some 10 mins we didn’t speak anything … kept gazing at the sea in front of us .. “ so what now” I broke the silence…. “ what now???” ….i guess my unusually serious tone seemed to fox her … “ I mean what about us now”… I actually wanted to ask what are we gonna do about our relationship ..cause I had just a week left before I left for another course to the far east and which I knew was gonna be jam packed meeting all relatives and stuff … virtually it might have been my last meeting in this leave… “ well nothing about us … nothing can happen between us anyways” …saying this … the only expression she got of me was a wide mouth open … the effect of both the drinks was undone … “ aa well ya I know ..but we can try though” ( I sounded like a desparate sailor trying to save his drowning boat ) .. “ well you really want this to work out .. I don’t think it will yaar” why was she becoming so cynical ?? she was so casual about it … and I wasn’t even out from the previous day s kiss we had…..i didn’t know what to say .. though I was already crying within .. I wanted actually shout my lungs out and say . .. ‘why does it always happen with me’ …. “ waise why will it not work out .. I don’t see any problem” I tried to be calm saying that … “ yaar you are in the air force ..you hardly come home .. your job doesn’t allow you to be there at a place for a long time ,and i really wanna work now ..i cant leave Mumbai as if now yaar … basically we both are living in different worlds all together”….she said calmly and casually …I guess if was possible to look inside my heart this time .. it would have been fully flooded with tears …. “ yaar aisa nahi hai … I come almost twice a year for a month home re and I never said you should not work or something neither im talking about any future plans like marriage n all .. its just that we should be together .. and we ll see how we manage meeting each other n all” I sounded as feeble and weak as a school boy who just had been punished for not having any valid reason for coming late… “ nahi yaar .. don’t think all these things … I m not going anywhere .. we ll be together till the time you are here … but there cannot be a committed relation ship between us re” ….she really confused me saying this .. what did she mean by that we ll be together but wont have any relationship??? Maybe I never had an conversation or intentions like these before… maybe I really was young for her … maybe the lifestyle she lives in ..its a very normal thing …. I really was confused .. I guess I had my next drink in this confusion … I really don’t remember what I ate that day as I was feeling like vomiting now .. ( may be it was because of those tears accumulated in me now ) … we left that place hardly speaking to each other now … and I followed my decision of paying the bill …. She saw that I had turned all white now hearing her ideas .. “ yaar itna kyun soch rahe ho .. forget it .. live life in the present re .. we are together now na ..then why are you thinking so much about the future ??” she said getting into the taxi … “ yaar is it that im in the airforce .. that’s why we cant have a relationship ?? and then why did you meet me in the first place if you wanted to end it this way .. I thought we really had connected and attracted to each other” I sounded a bit rude …. “ shounak” she said holding me in her arms … “ don’t think so much yaar .. I really like you actually love you for what you are … you are a great company to be with … but lets be practical yaar .. how are we gonna manage ourselves ?? I would keep craving to meet you .. to see you .. and I know you are bound by your job .. and same is with me .. I m bound by my job .. I cannot leave it as if now .. .. but we ll be with each other whenever you come down ..also we ll be speaking on phone and all … but planning about a relationship and future is not practical at all yaar” she kept holding my hand tightly … “ I don’t know what to say re .. I thought me being in the airforce had got you speaking to me .. and see what an irony .. the same reason seems to ruin our relation … I have not been in many relationships yaar .. maybe im not practical enough in these aspects of life .. maybe I treat my near and dear ones my friends too special” I said looking straight .. I didn’t wanna look at her …she was the female I really had fallen in love … thought was a dream come true and a perfect girl for me…that I had never had a chemistry with anyone before as I had with her ..that too when we had met just once … things seemed to be magical the previous night and it all seemed perfect .. and now everything was just over like that .. without any reason .. without any hassel … no questions asked ..no answers given … I kept silent for the rest of the journey …kept thinking why is me being the victim of circumstantial reasons everytime and compromising my desires and wants … was I really a loser …was i really being impractical … is this the way all ambitious girls think … I used to think even I was ambitious ..was I ?? do I know what I really I want from life … is it that love and love stories happen only in books and movies …. Will I never have one???... anyways I followed my decision of dropping her home first … I got out to say goodnight ..when she asked .. “ so when are we meeting next”… “ I don’t know … maybe ill leave tomorrow itself”…I said still not looking at her … “ why ..you still have a week to go na?why are leaving tomorrow?” …. I smirked “maybe because I don’t think the way you do .. I believing in doing things which might not work out” …I smiled kissed her hand …got into the waiting taxi and maybe left her forever …….
The person you love ..let her go ..if she comes back she is yours ..if she doesn’t she was never yours !!!!!
Coming back home I felt like being aakash of dil chahta hai!!( role played by aamir khan) when he knows that the girl he loved is leaving him forever (preity zinta) .. even felt being a part of the song ‘tanhanyee’ difference being he was sitting in a cab in Australia and me in a taxi in amchi Mumbai … anyways la dil chahta hai style I decided to leave Mumbai the very next day ..difference being aakash had left australia to get his girl and I was leaving cause the girl didn’t want me ..or may be didn’t see any future with me … on being asked me why was I going back so soon .. I gave my parents a lame excuse of some service aircraft getting rescheduled ... actually I really wanted to run away somewhere … I even couldn’t drink in front of my parents … well without much delay I was off to the east again bagdogra for my conversion course on the helicopter I was supposed to fly at mohanbari ( my posting place) …. I was least interested the course and somehow just had those two memorable evenings at the back of my mind … I had changed my phone number so any possibility of she calling me also was ruled out .. I used to drink every single day I had landed up there .. i believe being devdas was the only option left with me in my miserable life… I really don’t know which day it was and with whom I was sitting in the bar .. when a course mate said casually “ yaar see..there is no point thinking about it again and again .. cause you are thinking from only your point of view .. try and think from her point of view also na …” I don’t know what he wanted to convey but yess…. Well!!! So true I had never realized this before .. I had never thought about her.. .her life .. her job .. her wants … I was only bothered about my convience …she should meet me when I m on leave .. she should be free only when I want her to be … and this advice of my friend .. ( I guess he spoke what I wanted to listen from a long time) got me really thinking … she never said I wanna break up or something .. she never said I ll never meet you n all… she only said there cannot be a future between us .. and that I guess means that we can never be married .. well who wanted to marry anyways !!!.. I was just 23 yaar .. and who knows what the future holds in store .. maybe we should just be as we are .. as long as we are together and having a nice time .. how does it matter whether we marry or not .. cause thinking about the future actually isn’t worth spoiling your present for….. and what was it that I was expecting from her anyways?? She was ready to meet me .. she was the perfect company to spend time with … then what the hell was the problem … I smiled to myself finished the last drink and decided to get back to this girl who actually was so damn right in her place … she was practical and not being sentimental .. not having any expectations from me .. ready to be in my company ….then why was I being such a drag by expecting a commitment for the future from her ( that’s what girls are supposed to do) and getting all sentimental about it … I decided to get back to my lost love .. actually it wasn’t lost .. I had run away from it … c on shounak you should not let her go … be with her … no matter what happens … who knows one day she ll start loving you the way you love her and would be ready to leave the world for you … its you who should express your love freely no matter what she thinks or she wants .. it s you should love her unconditionally … I guess that’s what true love is … no conditions apply!!!!! And then who knows what the future holds for you .. we are not even sure what is gonna happen tomorrow.. so why think about commitment , marriage and things which are beyond our scope….
I decided to give her a call finally after almost not talking to her for 03 weeks now .. but I wasn’t gonna make so easy … I surely had to do something special to make her realize that I still was there for her … I decided to write a poem for her … yes!!! I wrote a poem for her .. I had a very unsuccessful past of writing things especially romantic for girls but nevertheless I decided ill read it out to her ..
“hello” I was hearing this voice after almost a month ,,,
“ SO FAR SO GOOD...
>
> My life was filled with no aim and lies,
> busy days n unenjoyable skies .
> I ran from my small problems ,
> and hid my loneliness,
> i ran and ran.
> i never found my fear ,
> but still made everyone cheer.
> hid my tears and still found no one so near.
> i always expressed love ,
> but never found the right dove.
> everything was so black and white ,
> my life was nothing but a mere fight.
> until i met u,
> the internet made it happen so fast ,
> coz i didnt want to reach the last .
> your angel voice mesmerised my existence ,
> helped me forget my past grievences.
> the day i met u and looked in ur eyes,
> i knew where i belong.. away from the routine and
> all
> ties...
> i thought those are the eyes where i stay,
> every night and every day... never wanting go away.
> but i realized its a fool's paradise ..
> so wat u are my life s most beautiful surprise.
> i ve always learnt to chase the sunshine .. but i
> know
> U NEVER CAN BE MINE ...
> but still you continue to be the one whom i hurt
> and
> pain ..
> and u always r ready to take the blame .
> i help u with nothing and have nothing to gain ..
> but still pursue to be a part of this game.
> i m still very afraid maybe to lose evrything ..
> wen even though id lose only a person..
> NEHA u are my hope , my joy ,, my safe place away..
> i jus wanted you to know..
> yours BABYs thoughts have changed today and
> I LOVE YOU is all i ve tried to say.. “
I finished reading it out to her…. “ don’t tell me you wrote it”…. “ aa well surprisingly I did write it sweety … look im sorry for being such a drag yaar … you were right ..as long as we are enjoying each others company why should think about the future .. if it has to work out it will..” I said in the most apologetic tone … “ acha!!! (she must have smiled) toh aaj ek mahine baad realize ho raha hai ki I was right haan … and all the natak you did of running away n all …. You are a big nautanki I must say … anyways if I say I m not interested in you now then?” she asked teasingly …. “hmm then ..have you seen dil chahta hai?? Ill end up at your marriage just like aamir khan did and hold your hand and say this poem again” I replied confidently( pretty smart answer i guess) …. “acha .. she I told you are a big nautanki…anyways where the hell are you and when are coming down next” ….. and we were back to normal …. Thank god we were talking normally now !!!!......I told u na she was perfect for me …. Every time I spoke to her … she spoke in that carefree.. .practical tone which I had fallen in love with by now … where do we get girlfriends like this … I could never ask for more … how foolish I was leaving her and running away….. anyways we were back to our old routine of speaking in the afternoons after my classes and latenights till one of us didn’t drop dead sleeping….
I completed yet another course successfully ( well dont ask me my grading) and was given another leave before I could join my unit in the far east …another leave meant another opportunity to meet her again … my parents were luckily in Mumbai that time and decided to give them a surprise by landing up without notice .. actually wanted to meet her and then go home … I got a lift in a service aircraft till mumbai … i landed up in the early evening .. we had decided to meet first then go home……
Not just jazz by the bay!!!!!
Getting out of the taxi millions of thoughts started cluttering my mind .. does she really drink ?? will she like be drunk ?? will I have to carry her like those dates in Hollywood movies ( recently being incorporated in hindi movies too!!) and will we land up in bed tonight … will I be able to handle it ..how much money do I have ?? what the hell I don’t even know the way back home …!!!!
“ do you have 20 bucks change” …..” hmm ya .. ( stupid don’t give her the change pay the taxi fare you ass) hey wait ill pay ( my chivalrous fauji woke up) ….. “nah nah I have already paid don’t bother anyways I got the change” … “ no no ill pay” …. “aare nahi see you are in Bombay now na .. ill treat you in this city” ( wow!! The typical Gemini miser I was maybe waiting for hearing this …but this statement of her s made years back she still keeps her word … she just doesn’t allow me to pay .. either she knows how fauji s are paid or she s a hard core feminist .. anyways I absolutely have no problems with it …) .. mondegar café is on one of the main street s of colaba , one of the see facing front of Mumbai, and is lighted up like a old goa street selling old antiques and imported stuff from the dockyards …its generally flooded with the foreign tourists and street vendors… walking inside mondegar I felt I entered one of the cow boy bar s in texas … the place was full of white skinned people god knows where they came from!!! And the set up seemed to have been picked up from some old cow boy movies with a cane wood furniture .. closely placed tables … a juke box in one end … well i had never entered a place like this in Mumbai … (what the hell where ill get that lonely corner to chat and drink with her) ..before this thought had crossed my mind I found her placing herself on her chair next to the juke box .. the table was almost on one edge of it … (hey I wanted pull he chair for you ya ).. she was really one girl with ‘im in control’ attitude … “ so wat will you have” she pops up… “ well let me see” … “ I guess beer” she says …. ( now she really reads my mind man ) .. “ well ya how about you” … “hmm ill take wine today” ( today ?? what does that mean …. ) .. “so you generally take wine haan” … “nah nah …I like vodka ..lekin aaj ghar bhi jaana hai” ( ok so the going to bed wit her tonight is not happening tonight .. I guess neither the lifting her up thing...) and so my first date starts with a toast of beer and wine … the conversation seemed decent for about first half hour and the till first rotation of drinks took place .. “ so do you smoke”( i actually asked out of curiosity ..as I knew she didn’t)… “ hmm ya only when I drink” ( what!!!!!!! She is awesome man .. where was she all this while man .. I thought its only in movies where people go out on their first date to a beer bar .. drink and smoke together ) well but the catch was I never smoked maybe one odd occasion … “ hmm well I don’t have a cigarette” .. “ well that’s ok they keep it ask the waiter he ll get it” …. So here we are two drinks down …smoking Marlboro lights .. chatting the hell about each and everything we been through .. about girlfriends .. boyfriends .. why into flying … you look good in that pic on orkut and stuff …I know it is pretty normal for many people but it was becoming like a dream date come true!!! Three drinks down and we were all laughing our jaws out .. was I being really funny?? Anyways somehow with every drink the volume of our talk seemed to increase …the waiters or bouncers or whatever they were supposed to be seemed to only observe us ..maybe only me and waiting for the earliest opportunity to throw me out ..i guess they were nt that happy with the pair … anyways I was on cloud 9 .. I was already feeling like hugh grant from ‘notting hill’ dating Julia Roberts or something … I even played ‘leaving on the jet plane’ the john denver version in the juke box which was about a hands distance from where I was sitting ..
It was maybe 4 or 5 drinks down when we walked out of mondegar café ..( man I m not gonna forget this place) .. I was already feeling like a cow boy walking out of this bar … with the girl I may be dreamt of being with … trying to smoke stylishly … and trying not to stumble down while walking .. man I was drunk !!!! “ so where are heading now” I asked … “maybe home” she says … “nah lets take a walk or something na … hey whats that ..is that the taj hotel??” …. “ ya its just walking distance from here” …. “ oh wow that means the gateway of india is nearby haan” ( that sounded so kiddish ) hey lets walk till gateway of india na” … “ for what ? what are we gonna do there” …. “ aare chal na” …. So we start walking towards the greatest tourist spot of mumbai which I guess I had seen a million times but with her it seemed so hopelessly romantic .. maybe I just wanted to spent more time with her now… now gateway of india is one spot which actually represents Mumbai in the statement ‘the city that never sleeps’ as it was 1030 pm and the place was crowded the same way it was on colaba street at 0830 … maybe the entire crowd of mondegar came here for a walk .. or maybe it was a one way and people had to come this way to go further ahead .. anyways approaching the gateway I realized a man rushing towards with something black in his hand .. is it a gun?? “ bhai saab photo khichani hai kya?” …. Photo?? Ohh it’s a Polaroid camera .. the one which gives you instantaneous photos … “ nahi nahi” she replied even before I was trying to register what did he really want from me … “well… haan lenge… lets take a pic na plzzz”( what the hell … im sure it was one of her most embarrassing moments) …. “ what are you crazy … im not taking a picture” … “aare plzz just one yaar .. for our first meeting( im being a loser again)” … “nahi yaar this is so cheap”… “ aare nothing ya ..haan bhaiya le lo” …..before she could react I was already holding her tight with my left hand and posing in front of the gateway of india… “ aare yeh achi nahi hai … ek aur lo” I thought I was wasn’t looking good at all( what difference it makes .its not the photographer s fault anyways!!!) “ you are really mad .. I m not taking any more pics” .. “ aare plz last one .. stand otherwise ill pick you up”( pick you up????? What was that .. I never heard that even in a movie) …. “ I cant believe im doing this” … there came the second picture .. “wow you look really good ya”( I was actually looking at myself) .. “ chalo ho gaya let s go now” … “ aare wait na …. Hey whats that ?? are those boats sailing now?” … “ that is not a boat it’s a ferry ride” …. “ wow lets go na it wont take long plzzzzz” …. “ uff this is too much shounak ..that meant for kids yaar” …… “ no yaar it ll be fun ..i have never been in one plz see its about to leave it’s the last one ya … plz I don’t know whether ill meet you again or no” that was not at all sentimental and sounded so stupid that we both started laughing. .. “ well chalo” I said and both jumped into the ferry for 10 bucks a ticket … sitting on the first floor of that junk ferry boat are two drunk people sitting in the middle of middle aged women with their kids .. ( man where have so many kids come that this time )and only odd people were both of us .. trying to control our laughter in middle of that floating kindergarten… I guess all the aunties were staring at me … maybe even they wanted to throw me out at the earliest opportunity … do they know im drunk or something ? are we smelling ?... “ lets go downstairs na .. bahut boring hai upar” I said looking at a real healthy aunty staring babdly at me .. “ ok” chalo…. Wow!!! To my surprise there was actually no own except that ferry staff on the ground floor of that boat … “lets stand there in the corner” and we moved right at the back of the boat …which the loneliest part of that boat … now the ride seemed really exotic .. it was a dark night ( its generally is in Mumbai) only sound of the waves and yes the kids on the first floor … i could hear and see a chetak helicopter at a distance maybe a navy aircraft doing night flying… “ well you know this has been the best date ever” I broke the silence … “ my previous girlfriend was a real jerk” ….she smiles comes close to me “ im standing here and you still are remembering your ex girlfriend” … I cannot explain in words the expression in her eyes .. if I had a weak heart .. I probably would have had an heart attack ….i cannot forget those eyes … we moved more closer and before I realized our lips had locked .. they were as delicate as petals … everything seemed to have become standstill.. I could no longer hear the children …neither the chopper flying nor the waves … I guess this is what is like being in heaven … oooo…. Whats this I had a strange feeling in my pants .. ok its not what you guys thinking about .. I mean yes that too.. but it was my cell vibrating and ringing … great la bollywood style ..the phone rings at the wrong time .. “ hello dad …ya im still with my coursemate ( that s what I had told the reason to leave home) .. hmm im at colaba .. will take atleast 45 mins more to reach back” … ( look idiot what have you ruined …) ….. “ hey im sorry ..” I thought I had again goofed it all up .. but I was wrong .. that look I mentioned before was still there in her eyes maybe more naughtier now .. I couldn’t keep my hands off her … “ I knew it was you” I whispered in her ear ..( I have no clue what it meant may I wanted to tell her that was it you I had got into the airforce for …I always dreamt about .. always wanted a girlfriend like you .. I really don’t know) but it all seemed perfect now …
The ferry brought us back to the gateway of india… I had walked into the boat having a decent distance from her .. I was getting down all hand in hand …. Things had definitely changed between us in that half an hour …we caught a taxi back home … I even bought a rose ..those really long stem ones they sell at traffic signals ..i know I was embarrassing her but now I didn’t care .. I guess even she didn’t care now ..cause she broke the stem and folded the flower like a bedsheet and kept it in her purse ( I guess she still has it) … anyways I was the one who got down first as my home happened to be on the way first ( what a loser again … should have dropped her first) anyways ..a good bye kiss and a promise to meet tomorrow kept me awake entire night as I recollected every moment I had spend my first date with her ….
The second disaster!!!!!we broke up
The second disaster!!!!!we broke up
“hey when are we meeting today” the first thing I did after I woke up was this sms… “ well don’t know yaar slightly busy in the office today “ …. “ what .. plz do meet na otherwise ill come at your office” ( I had no clue where her office was ) …. “ thik hai baba .. will meet around 0730 ..anyways you don’t know where my office is “ ( I told you she s much smarter than me)… entire day I kept thinking about how am I gonna go about this evening ..no fuck ups this time .. will pay all the bills and yes also drop her home first ….. all set for the evening ..even brought a new deodorant for that … we decided to meet somewhere near to the chowpatty … she told me she knew a good sea facing restaurant there ..but couldn’t remember its name .. but knew the approximate location.. now if she doesn’t know where the place is it’s a real emergency for me to tell the taxi driver where to stop ..so my evening begins with (yet again ) a loser question “ hey tell me where should I tell the taxi driver to take me yaar” … “aare just tell him to take you to chowpatty” … “ aare im already on chowpatty its so big yaar” …. “ what you already reached ?? y so early its still 0700 re” … “ aare you don’t know my parents yaar I have to come out of the house early …coming late ill manage a reason” … I actually had no course mate of mine in Mumbai that time but just an imaginary naval coursemate whose name I was using to step out of the house …. Well she guided me to somewhere near that place where we were supposed to meet .. ‘salt water grill’ the name really appeared exciting to me .. it was a open air restaurant on the beach adjoining the chowpatty .. a real exotic location though it was just off the main road .. so not much silence ..but the location seemed mind blowing .. it was a fully open air place with a wooden stage kind of thing where they had placed wooden tables …. Chiffon transparent curtains separated each table from the other and was beautifully lit by candles in those long glass holders .. in the middle was a sandy open portion where they had placed two or three big hammocks … I guess two people of my size could easily sleep in them .. whether they will be able to hold my weight or no Im not sure .. ahead of that was the sea face which had those sun bath chairs with cushions .. which actually had been made as a sitting arrangement with a small table in between .. you would be facing the sea if you d be lying on them … I decided that we would be sitting there once she arrives … “where are you im already thr” I asked her “aare me in taxi will be thr in 15 mins” came the reply …. There was a water sports outlet or club something next to the restaurant .. kids where all over the place there … and seemed to be quite crowded even though it was turning dark .. I walked further ahead towards the beach .. there was a long bridge jetting into the sea .. it was used as a mounting platform by the water sports club for getting onto those speed boats and water bikes .. looking around I got an beautiful view of the brightly lit Mumbai at dusk … it suddenly started smelling good looking at that view …when i realized that she was standing right behind me .. “ ohh .. hey hi … when did you come .. waise nice perfume” ( what nice perfume!! … what a dog !! she must have thought in her mind I guess) … “ just came ..saw you gazing at the skyline” … “ ohh ya its pretty beautiful .. but not as u look today” ( god I really have to read some good one liner book man and stop seeing shahrukh khan movies) … well she was looking stunning anyways .. wearing that light yellow office shirt and cream trousers she again appeared perfect … I pity the guys working with her .. im sure she would be a real distraction at her work place … anyways appearing to be fully in control this time I directed her towards the restaurant ( forgot that she was the one who had selected the place afterall)… we placed ourselves each on those sun bath chairs with that stupid table in between … well I must say these chairs are really comfortable ..i guess I should one of them in front of my tv … “ so what will you have” I asked … “ hmm let me see” she said picking up the menu .. it had some fancy names for the cocktails they served … “hmm I ll have this one” … I don’t remember what the name was , but reading the contents written below it made it clear it was some vodka based cocktail .. “ hmm so vodka today haan” I asked teasingly… “ don’t wanna go home today kya” …she smiled and replied “ sure we are going to your house after this” ( she knew I didn’t have the balls to take her to my place anyways) … I also ordered something which I couldn’t pronounce but expected to be good ….
I don’t know if it happens with any one else but when I drink everything seems beautiful to me .. and I start noticing minute details of people … I noticed she had a black lining under her eyes and her eyes were carefully worn with a mild makeup which was enhancing her eyes beautifully … “ hey you have amazing eyes” I said finishing my drink , i got up from my chair and shifted onto her s ( ok I was trying to do that for a long time ) … and now both of us were placed on the same chair … for some 10 mins we didn’t speak anything … kept gazing at the sea in front of us .. “ so what now” I broke the silence…. “ what now???” ….i guess my unusually serious tone seemed to fox her … “ I mean what about us now”… I actually wanted to ask what are we gonna do about our relationship ..cause I had just a week left before I left for another course to the far east and which I knew was gonna be jam packed meeting all relatives and stuff … virtually it might have been my last meeting in this leave… “ well nothing about us … nothing can happen between us anyways” …saying this … the only expression she got of me was a wide mouth open … the effect of both the drinks was undone … “ aa well ya I know ..but we can try though” ( I sounded like a desparate sailor trying to save his drowning boat ) .. “ well you really want this to work out .. I don’t think it will yaar” why was she becoming so cynical ?? she was so casual about it … and I wasn’t even out from the previous day s kiss we had…..i didn’t know what to say .. though I was already crying within .. I wanted actually shout my lungs out and say . .. ‘why does it always happen with me’ …. “ waise why will it not work out .. I don’t see any problem” I tried to be calm saying that … “ yaar you are in the air force ..you hardly come home .. your job doesn’t allow you to be there at a place for a long time ,and i really wanna work now ..i cant leave Mumbai as if now yaar … basically we both are living in different worlds all together”….she said calmly and casually …I guess if was possible to look inside my heart this time .. it would have been fully flooded with tears …. “ yaar aisa nahi hai … I come almost twice a year for a month home re and I never said you should not work or something neither im talking about any future plans like marriage n all .. its just that we should be together .. and we ll see how we manage meeting each other n all” I sounded as feeble and weak as a school boy who just had been punished for not having any valid reason for coming late… “ nahi yaar .. don’t think all these things … I m not going anywhere .. we ll be together till the time you are here … but there cannot be a committed relation ship between us re” ….she really confused me saying this .. what did she mean by that we ll be together but wont have any relationship??? Maybe I never had an conversation or intentions like these before… maybe I really was young for her … maybe the lifestyle she lives in ..its a very normal thing …. I really was confused .. I guess I had my next drink in this confusion … I really don’t remember what I ate that day as I was feeling like vomiting now .. ( may be it was because of those tears accumulated in me now ) … we left that place hardly speaking to each other now … and I followed my decision of paying the bill …. She saw that I had turned all white now hearing her ideas .. “ yaar itna kyun soch rahe ho .. forget it .. live life in the present re .. we are together now na ..then why are you thinking so much about the future ??” she said getting into the taxi … “ yaar is it that im in the airforce .. that’s why we cant have a relationship ?? and then why did you meet me in the first place if you wanted to end it this way .. I thought we really had connected and attracted to each other” I sounded a bit rude …. “ shounak” she said holding me in her arms … “ don’t think so much yaar .. I really like you actually love you for what you are … you are a great company to be with … but lets be practical yaar .. how are we gonna manage ourselves ?? I would keep craving to meet you .. to see you .. and I know you are bound by your job .. and same is with me .. I m bound by my job .. I cannot leave it as if now .. .. but we ll be with each other whenever you come down ..also we ll be speaking on phone and all … but planning about a relationship and future is not practical at all yaar” she kept holding my hand tightly … “ I don’t know what to say re .. I thought me being in the airforce had got you speaking to me .. and see what an irony .. the same reason seems to ruin our relation … I have not been in many relationships yaar .. maybe im not practical enough in these aspects of life .. maybe I treat my near and dear ones my friends too special” I said looking straight .. I didn’t wanna look at her …she was the female I really had fallen in love … thought was a dream come true and a perfect girl for me…that I had never had a chemistry with anyone before as I had with her ..that too when we had met just once … things seemed to be magical the previous night and it all seemed perfect .. and now everything was just over like that .. without any reason .. without any hassel … no questions asked ..no answers given … I kept silent for the rest of the journey …kept thinking why is me being the victim of circumstantial reasons everytime and compromising my desires and wants … was I really a loser …was i really being impractical … is this the way all ambitious girls think … I used to think even I was ambitious ..was I ?? do I know what I really I want from life … is it that love and love stories happen only in books and movies …. Will I never have one???... anyways I followed my decision of dropping her home first … I got out to say goodnight ..when she asked .. “ so when are we meeting next”… “ I don’t know … maybe ill leave tomorrow itself”…I said still not looking at her … “ why ..you still have a week to go na?why are leaving tomorrow?” …. I smirked “maybe because I don’t think the way you do .. I believing in doing things which might not work out” …I smiled kissed her hand …got into the waiting taxi and maybe left her forever …….
The person you love ..let her go ..if she comes back she is yours ..if she doesn’t she was never yours !!!!!
Coming back home I felt like being aakash of dil chahta hai!!( role played by aamir khan) when he knows that the girl he loved is leaving him forever (preity zinta) .. even felt being a part of the song ‘tanhanyee’ difference being he was sitting in a cab in Australia and me in a taxi in amchi Mumbai … anyways la dil chahta hai style I decided to leave Mumbai the very next day ..difference being aakash had left australia to get his girl and I was leaving cause the girl didn’t want me ..or may be didn’t see any future with me … on being asked me why was I going back so soon .. I gave my parents a lame excuse of some service aircraft getting rescheduled ... actually I really wanted to run away somewhere … I even couldn’t drink in front of my parents … well without much delay I was off to the east again bagdogra for my conversion course on the helicopter I was supposed to fly at mohanbari ( my posting place) …. I was least interested the course and somehow just had those two memorable evenings at the back of my mind … I had changed my phone number so any possibility of she calling me also was ruled out .. I used to drink every single day I had landed up there .. i believe being devdas was the only option left with me in my miserable life… I really don’t know which day it was and with whom I was sitting in the bar .. when a course mate said casually “ yaar see..there is no point thinking about it again and again .. cause you are thinking from only your point of view .. try and think from her point of view also na …” I don’t know what he wanted to convey but yess…. Well!!! So true I had never realized this before .. I had never thought about her.. .her life .. her job .. her wants … I was only bothered about my convience …she should meet me when I m on leave .. she should be free only when I want her to be … and this advice of my friend .. ( I guess he spoke what I wanted to listen from a long time) got me really thinking … she never said I wanna break up or something .. she never said I ll never meet you n all… she only said there cannot be a future between us .. and that I guess means that we can never be married .. well who wanted to marry anyways !!!.. I was just 23 yaar .. and who knows what the future holds in store .. maybe we should just be as we are .. as long as we are together and having a nice time .. how does it matter whether we marry or not .. cause thinking about the future actually isn’t worth spoiling your present for….. and what was it that I was expecting from her anyways?? She was ready to meet me .. she was the perfect company to spend time with … then what the hell was the problem … I smiled to myself finished the last drink and decided to get back to this girl who actually was so damn right in her place … she was practical and not being sentimental .. not having any expectations from me .. ready to be in my company ….then why was I being such a drag by expecting a commitment for the future from her ( that’s what girls are supposed to do) and getting all sentimental about it … I decided to get back to my lost love .. actually it wasn’t lost .. I had run away from it … c on shounak you should not let her go … be with her … no matter what happens … who knows one day she ll start loving you the way you love her and would be ready to leave the world for you … its you who should express your love freely no matter what she thinks or she wants .. it s you should love her unconditionally … I guess that’s what true love is … no conditions apply!!!!! And then who knows what the future holds for you .. we are not even sure what is gonna happen tomorrow.. so why think about commitment , marriage and things which are beyond our scope….
I decided to give her a call finally after almost not talking to her for 03 weeks now .. but I wasn’t gonna make so easy … I surely had to do something special to make her realize that I still was there for her … I decided to write a poem for her … yes!!! I wrote a poem for her .. I had a very unsuccessful past of writing things especially romantic for girls but nevertheless I decided ill read it out to her ..
“hello” I was hearing this voice after almost a month ,,,
“ SO FAR SO GOOD...
>
> My life was filled with no aim and lies,
> busy days n unenjoyable skies .
> I ran from my small problems ,
> and hid my loneliness,
> i ran and ran.
> i never found my fear ,
> but still made everyone cheer.
> hid my tears and still found no one so near.
> i always expressed love ,
> but never found the right dove.
> everything was so black and white ,
> my life was nothing but a mere fight.
> until i met u,
> the internet made it happen so fast ,
> coz i didnt want to reach the last .
> your angel voice mesmerised my existence ,
> helped me forget my past grievences.
> the day i met u and looked in ur eyes,
> i knew where i belong.. away from the routine and
> all
> ties...
> i thought those are the eyes where i stay,
> every night and every day... never wanting go away.
> but i realized its a fool's paradise ..
> so wat u are my life s most beautiful surprise.
> i ve always learnt to chase the sunshine .. but i
> know
> U NEVER CAN BE MINE ...
> but still you continue to be the one whom i hurt
> and
> pain ..
> and u always r ready to take the blame .
> i help u with nothing and have nothing to gain ..
> but still pursue to be a part of this game.
> i m still very afraid maybe to lose evrything ..
> wen even though id lose only a person..
> NEHA u are my hope , my joy ,, my safe place away..
> i jus wanted you to know..
> yours BABYs thoughts have changed today and
> I LOVE YOU is all i ve tried to say.. “
I finished reading it out to her…. “ don’t tell me you wrote it”…. “ aa well surprisingly I did write it sweety … look im sorry for being such a drag yaar … you were right ..as long as we are enjoying each others company why should think about the future .. if it has to work out it will..” I said in the most apologetic tone … “ acha!!! (she must have smiled) toh aaj ek mahine baad realize ho raha hai ki I was right haan … and all the natak you did of running away n all …. You are a big nautanki I must say … anyways if I say I m not interested in you now then?” she asked teasingly …. “hmm then ..have you seen dil chahta hai?? Ill end up at your marriage just like aamir khan did and hold your hand and say this poem again” I replied confidently( pretty smart answer i guess) …. “acha .. she I told you are a big nautanki…anyways where the hell are you and when are coming down next” ….. and we were back to normal …. Thank god we were talking normally now !!!!......I told u na she was perfect for me …. Every time I spoke to her … she spoke in that carefree.. .practical tone which I had fallen in love with by now … where do we get girlfriends like this … I could never ask for more … how foolish I was leaving her and running away….. anyways we were back to our old routine of speaking in the afternoons after my classes and latenights till one of us didn’t drop dead sleeping….
I completed yet another course successfully ( well dont ask me my grading) and was given another leave before I could join my unit in the far east …another leave meant another opportunity to meet her again … my parents were luckily in Mumbai that time and decided to give them a surprise by landing up without notice .. actually wanted to meet her and then go home … I got a lift in a service aircraft till mumbai … i landed up in the early evening .. we had decided to meet first then go home……
Not just jazz by the bay!!!!!
Sunday, October 4, 2009
My reflections
I read somewhere that if your life s worth thinking about its worth writing about , and there my mind makes it up finally to start penning it all down atleast about my sweetest surprise in life , n that if u visit my orkut profile you might be able to even see the picture of what im talking about . I always felt that my life was all about waiting for the right person and wait for that face to peep out of the skies and call out to me. kyunki “ bhawan ne sabko jodiyo main banaya hai …bas unka milna hum par chod diya hai …”.i always felt funny hearing such cheesy filmy dialogues however I always seem to have faith on them , because I believe our lives are nothing but a long movie that too a typical masala hindi movie where no matter what happens, there is always a “happy s endings”..... that actually makes my life a longer one . .. well another thought to this would be its a group of different movies which in their own way have their own endings which we try to link and make one good hellva hit movie. So goes my romantic tryst with life ….
I always had been fascinated with the idea of being a hindi film hero , saving the heroine from the bad guys and getting all the kisses and whether you actually marry the heroine or not who cares!! and in the next sequel you get the kisses from someone else …anyways dreams are always good till the time you are asleep ,you have to wake up to get them real and I never got up may be .. I always lived in my fascinations .well but the desires never died and the nearest I could be getting those kisses was wearing the uniform and getting attracted by the fairer sex. I really don’t know why I thought so ..may be because of again movies like TOPGUN and IRON EAGLE and living in a town like pune and seeing the gals go all ga- ga over nda guys I somehow got convinced that it was in that fighter aircraft and becoming a “ real hero “ that I would be able to live my dreams of living that glamourous life .. kiddish na .. well I wont lie but it was truly one the major and I guess the only reason to choose he so called “ man s life” and I land in nda … through out nda I was one the typical faces in the 1800 cadets standing in attention in the passing out parade and expecting that a beautiful chick would be looking at you from that distance of about 900 meters and really admiring you ( I really don’t know for what ) and after the parade coming upto you and giving you her phone number jus because you stood there wearing the uniform .. and yes roaming on the famous MG road taking that crew cut ( read no hair on head) and expecting that she would reply positively to the cheapiest question one can ever ask to a stranger “ can you be my ball partner?” .. well the reply never came as expected and I lost the hope of being that TOP GUN ..
And the reply comes ….
This was the time I was commissioned in the airforce and as usual I had not got what I wanted ..i was commissioned into helicopters instead of fighters ( the one decision I don’t regret about) , I was the usual breed of airforce pilots who wait for hours wearing leather jackets and flashing their new bikes and yes who can forget the patent rayban aviators and expect that the chicks would make the first move and respect that rear seat of your bike … well the rear seat remains a virgin and you … ( no comments)… hmm so coming back this was the time I had come back home from my second stage of basic flying and spend some time before I set for my conversion course to the exotic east .. so there I was at home and searching for my lost friends on the vast world of orkut ….hmm typed neha … results shown 1348 … hmm going through the pics stopped onto a stamp sized pic of a chick wearing brown shades .. white top .. and seemed to be slim .. name .. neha jaguste( well what kind of a surname is that )
“ hey interesting profile …. Like to be friends “ ( how sick n typical ) well I had nothing else to write as the profile actually had nothing interesting and revealing about this lady in white except some 5 pics ..and written “to know me ask my friends “ ( so why not become one and ask her),anyways this was also the time when anybody could see ur pics on ur profile and you could not restrict the viewing … I don’t know really attracted me the most maybe the smile I guess …( that’s always I guess) the rest of the browsing session was any ways boring as I never bothered to find the neha I was looking for and no one as usual replied me on messenger .
… “ hey nice pics dude … so you in the airforce haan “ …. Yessss she actually accepted my friends request and my being in uniform and clicking pics in front of the udan ghatola ( chetak helicopter) came in handy after such a long time … wow !! how eagerly I was waiting something like this happen …. “ hmm ya me a chopper pilot in the airforce … so u know anyone in the airforce?”( I reaaalllly don’t know why the heck I wrote this .. may be to rule out the possibility of she knowing any of my seniors and knowing my so good for nothing profile in the airforce) …. “ nah I have no friends in the defence “….. (thank god this is my chance) …” ohh k …well you have someone now..( thts the line I always wanted to start with.. perfect!!!) waise u there on yahoo would be better if we chat thr if u don’t mind .. do add me shounak4u2@yahoo.co.in” ( now tht was to get more personal .. after all I was her defence friend now ) … the next thing is the messenger window popping with the message “ neha jaguste would like to add you as her friend .. accept or decline “ decline????? I wonder why is that option even given to me …n before she would have blinked her eyes away I was there “ hey wassup” well I had no idea tht this chatting session is gonna start a new chapter in this movie of mine which I had no clue about….
Getting her buzz……
Well kehte hai pyar ki shuruwat aankon se hoti hai … but in a fauji s life I guess pyar phone se shuru hota hai .. because invariably the girl a fauji falls for has to be in his home town or his training town ( thts the town he does his training in) and for some lucky one s like me she belongs to a third town all together so that even if I come home I don’t get to meet her .. so the only means , mode and the link remains the greatest invention of all THE TELEPHONE .. cause how much ever you spend time chatting and scrapping her till the time you don’t hear her voice there is that vacuum(well skype does that for you now )… so whats s the big deal about that …jus go and ask her .. well I always had this thing about my ‘image’ I know its funny but will it appear that im horny ?? will it appear that she feels that all airforce officers are horny ??? such silly thoughts kept going through my mind till the time I was all set to ask her number in the next chatting session which generally used to happen in the evening ,where she used to chat from her office … I started with “ hey so u do have a mobile right” ( that’s so stupid … what an jackass class of question) and the smart answer “ ya why “ hmm well why????? I freaking don t know why .. maybe because I m actually horny now or maybe I m just desperate to hear you now …instead I reply one of the most innovative though typical answers of a fauji which generally everyone believes “ well the thing is that im off to a god forsaken place in the east for a month where I don’t know whether net would be there or not and the maximum facility that may be available would be a std phone or something .. n I really wanna be in touch with you ya “ ( me was actually going to bagdogra a place highly exotic and well connected ) … I guess she had already started reading my mind or something and replied “ hmm well thts ok in case we have to talk we ll talk eventually “ what??? … what does that mean ??does she believe in destiny and stuff or is she really too smart for me … this day was 26 th july ..i distinctively remember this date as the next thing she types “ hey I gtg … blasts in local train around 150 dead .. I have to leave office now “…. I say “ what the fuck…. please give me ur number ya .. im really worried for you plzzz”( the hopeless opportunist that I was nothing better was expected anyways) .. and she finally says “ I really don’t know what are you gonna do with this number still its 098xxxxxxx”
The phone call prodigies
“ hey wassup so finally we talk haan “ and the most awaited sound comes from the other side … who knew that the alexander graham bell invention is gonna be the most important part in this movie. Well the first buzz did reveal a hellva of things to me … my effort calling her at midnight in my balcony without awaking my parents dint go waste . first of all I came to know she s got an innocent voice … she s an investment banker !!! well till now I just know she s a CA which itself im not sure what exactly they do .. and now what the hell is an investment banker .. the only meaningful word was banker which I guess is the person who sits behind the counter and stamps your pay in slips … anyways hearing about her job profile and lifestyle .. she definitely didn’t was the person meant to stamp pay in slips … any ways the crux of the matter was she into something that makes her earn much more than me and yes one more thing she was elder to me … well!!!! That was the reason no wonder she could read my mind so well and knew all my intentions well in advance …chalo now we have a story of a guy who has begun his carrier as an airforce officer .. has no clue about earning, saving , his future and is falling for a girl who is elder .. much mature … earns a hell lot more and maybe is just a fantasy that a girl like her might ever like him. So we move on after that midnight call and the chain never seem to break … on every silly reason tried to call her … forward her the most hedious of the sms , just to get her reply be it what ever …. I finally went to the east for the conversion course … got hold of the cheapiest cell connection and looked out for the most convenient net connection to have a chat at the earliest opportunity ..there were times I actually called up and said I could not concentrate on my exams cause I was thinking abt you ( how cheesy can that get ) well it didn’t end there .. how about “ I wrote ur name in my answer sheet “ ( shit man .. i really suck) anyways the calls got more frequent and the conversations more mature … well atleast I thought so … I moved to bangalore for my stage 3 training … well the conversations grew and grew .. once a day to twice a day .. well enough!!! There wasn’t a time I slept before 0100 am that being at the peak of my flying training .. but kehte hai na jo bhi karo dil ki sunna chaiye….i was somehow getting connected to her … and seemed to have found a person who actually spoke to me irrespective of my fauji status … whether I fly or no … what my financial status was…. Just spoke to me person to person in the true sense …no preset ideas .. no expections … and no ego … wow!! I really liked her man … how madly I wanted to meet her man … I had in the span of 6 months almost had known her living lifestyle but still I had known her somewhere I was feeling I still had a lot to know this female who really was blowing me away … all my effort of impressing chicks being a pilot was all balls attitude was shown to me by this really genuine chick who seemed to have only aim to be practical in every damn sphere of human influence and just take it easy!!!! Wow … isn’t it I really wanted to be like …..anyways getting identified with her I really wanted look into eyes and speak whole heartedly that thanks for being this wonderful surprise!!!!!
we meet finally
Well!! I managed to pass out of my this stage of training too.. the airforce really had accepted me by now and also had rewarded me with a posting to mohanbari … ( try finding it on the map!!!) I had no clue where I was supposed to go ,the only thing I knew that it was a place where the last highway and the railway line ends , and I was actually surprised that a airport existed at that place , needless to say the last Indian airport .. anyways I wasn’t bothered now no one was anyways gonna post me to Mumbai so anywhere I go it was immaterial .. but what really was important was the leave that I was getting before I set course to the Chinese timezone . I had only a month to meet her ,impress her and obviously win her!! Well it was a herculean task and very little time .. I neither had the looks of making somebody fall in love in the first sight nor I had talent and much experience to deal with smart women , but yes I was confident that five months of talking on phone will definitely have its own consideration . so there I was in mumbai and first time looking forward to meet someone other than my parents ….” 0730 sharp outside crossroads” I smartly called her at a walking distance from my place as ,though I spent a lot time in Mumbai but still not confident of the roads and the places there. So as a typical nervous ass I ended up half an hour before at the place and took a well survey as to where would I take her for a snack , where would we sit and chat , where would I take her for a walk .bloody hell what am I gonna do there is nothing around yaar … should I change the place .. why did I not think of this earlier .. will I again make a fool of myself … many thoughts started crossing my nut .. gosh what was I gonna speak ..though I had been speaking to her for a while now still today I didn’t know what topics am I gonna converse .. what if she doesn’t like my face itself .. what if she thinks im too fat … man !! im in trouble … so I decide I ll not be around the place and wait for her .. ill take a position opposite to the road and stand in that mall and first look at her .. what if she didn’t look the way she appeared on orkut .. what if she was shorter than I imagined .. so I take position opposite on the first floor in a mall overlooking the street where we would be meeting .. like a sharp sniper on the prowl I keep a sharp look out for any familiar face .. and there she is .. is it actually her …no no she isn’t that pretty .. plz god let it be her.. who is she calling … oops she s calling me ..” hey where are you .. im already there” man its her yaar …..” hey ya ya .. im also there are you wearin green top with black trousers” ….( stupid stupid ..what are telling her im having a nice look at you first then ill meet you)… “ hmm ya but where are you”….. she s the one man .. thank you god … “ ya im there just coming” …… I rush down on the road … “ hey I m sorry kept you waiting” and our eyes meet for the first time and shake hands . for the first 05 minutes I kept looking at her and like a desperate dog kept checking her out really good!!! She had the perfect stature I had expected .. she wasn’t short at all .. slim ..some shoulder length wavy hair with curls at the end .. just perfect!!!! I guess my horny looks were getting her uncomfortable so she said “ so where are we going ?”…. “ hmm I ..i really don’t know any place here yaar” ( what a loser ) “ well let s go to monde gar” ….. “ monde .. what??” .. “ aare it’s a beer bar at colaba ..its a nice place” … wow!!!! Did I just hear beer bar??? Or was it by mistake she said it … “ it’s a beer bar haan” well i knew she drinks but didn’t know she wanted her first date in a beer bar ..she was in full control man … she s so cooll!!!! “well chalo then what are we waiting for Christmas” comes my fast reply. That taxi ride .. that silence in the back seat for most of the journey .. that unsaid chemistry between us … everything seemed like a life time experience .. waise toh bahut baateein karta hai tu shounak aaj kya ho gaya tuje… aise chup kya baitha hua hai …. I was sitting like It was the first day of my school and that taxi was going to drop me to school. So the taxi finally pulled over at mondegar café .
Mondegar café !!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
